Tuesday, October 6, 2009

The Exception to the Rule

Most rules can be stretched or bent or realigned or outsourced to meet our needs. I'm sure that if kids were really required to "eat those peas or there will be no dessert for you, young lady," the pea industry would suddenly skyrocket. Investors would pull their money out of stocks and bonds and mattresses to get a piece of that action.

Then there's the whole i-before-e-except-after-c debacle. Remember the additional baloney "except as sounded as 'a' as in neighbor and weigh?" Well, how does one explain 'seize', 'weird' or 'deity'?

Thanks to an alert reader (Daughter), an exception to the Shoulder Pad Rule has been identified.

Yes, I know. Unbelievable.

However, a very small sub-group of the population exists for which shoulder pads are most useful and I am not referring to football players.

I am referring to Bobbleheads.

And you think bobbleheads only exist as baseball-game-giveaways and as bobbing-head, bobbling-hipped hula girls on the dashboard. No, the Bobblehead is alive and well and found mainly in its natural habitat, Los Angeles. Or in this case, somewhere in the 90210 zip code.

These are girls desperately in need of the shoulder pad and/or a sandwich. It is a miracle that they can even hold up those giant heads on their little tiny necks and little tiny selves.

And yet, I cannot, in good conscience, recommend shoulder pads. Even for these exceptions.

I can, however, recommend the sandwich. Wait, I lied.

Make it a salad.

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