Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Yes. Leave the Toilet Seat Up. Very Nice.

Warning: There is a crazy world out there, folks, filled with crazy people in crazy situations and those wacky real estate agents lead the pack. Of the crazies.

Or maybe the agents just run in packs, like hungry wolves circling the sparkling vampires or wild turkeys, looking for loose lady turkeys and free food.

Note: As a mildly amusing side note, my cell phone caller ID identifies my real estate professional as Agent Jane Doe and when she calls, for a brief moment, I imagine answering on my shoe phone and donning my x-ray vision glasses.

And those crazy agents speak in a crazy language which is taught to them in real estate school or in used car salesman school or by Satan himself, maybe.

For example, when an agent refers to a home as a cozy charmer she actually means that there is just one bathroom and it's across the street from the power plant. Beware the house in a great commute location unless living next door to the train station seems delightful. And do not be surprised when vintage turns out to mean that the appliances are harvest gold and shag green carpeting covers the entire house.

Note: As a mildly amusing side note, i recently viewed a house described as vintage, and the green shag carpeting extended completely up the sides of the bathtub in the ultra groovy master suite. Oh, if that shag carpeting could speak. The tales it could tell.

But thanks to the new world of Internet marketing, those crazy agents can entice the buyer to view a listing with glorious photos and virtual tours. Because, of course, a picture is worth a thousand words.

Actual photograph from an actual virtual tour:

When an open green toilet (and matching sink) becomes a selling point, you are in trouble, folks.

Sweet Holy Moses.

Actually, I am considering a new career in real estate. As a special agent. I've already got the crazy part down.

And I love talking into my shoes!

Heck, yes!

-Posted using BlogPress from my new iPad, Paddy Also.

1 comment:

Roger and Jackie Harris said...

OMG! And note the almost empty TP roll. I think the house I grew up in had a fridge that color. Seriously, update people and for goodness sakes close the lid..