Friday, May 13, 2011

You Give Aliens a Bad Name. Seriously.

So, alien sex.

The demure Katy Perry has graduated from kissing a girl and liking it to kissing aliens, aka Kanye West and really, really liking it, apparently.

Note: I am sure that her mother is so proud.

The premise of alien sex may seem unbelievable, but the following photographic evidence may sway the reader's opinion:

Actual Photograph of an Alien

Actual Photograph of Kanye West

Eerie, I know.

So, the Alien, aka Kanye West, tantalizes the "lady" with his sweet talk from Mars or Pluto or His-Anus, maybe:

I got a dirty mind ...
I’m tryna Bathe my Ape in your Milky Way
They calling me an alien
A big headed astronaut
Maybe it’s because your boy Yeezy get *** a lot.

But he's not done with the sweet talking yet, ladies:

Pockets on Shrek, Rockets on deck
Tell me what’s next, alien sex
I’ma disrobe you, than I’mma probe you
See I abducted you, so I tell ya what to do
I tell ya what to do, what to do, what to do

So, Miss Katy responds as any hot-blooded freak of nature:

Kiss me, ki-ki-kiss me
Infect me with your love and
Fill me with your poison

Take me, ta-ta-take me
Wanna be a victim
Ready for abduction

I wanna walk on your wave length
And be there when you vibrate
For you I'll risk it all.

Oh, I can't take it anymore. Please make it stop.

And it'll be a cold day on Mars before I eat a Milky Way again.

Note: I think it's always cold on Mars, but whatever.

Sweet Holy Moses.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Location:You Give Aliens A Bad Name. Seriously.


Penny said...

I just heard that the "milky way" really was named for lactating women but I cannot remember the source. Of course it was a really long time ago and then men had nothing else on their minds I am sure. No other way to describe it. I think that I am sorry that I even read the lyrics. Uh, thanks for the info but I do enjoy your writing.

Brookel said...

When and where were you listening to this song? was it a part of you trying to be relevant? :) I used to listen to crap like that in hs, I can't believe I did but it's true and thankfully I didn't end up pregnant, and especially thankful i didn't get pregnant with an alien baby!