Monday, May 3, 2010

Just Breathe Deeply. Wait, Don't Do It!


I am looking through a magazine. It is a magazine for women. It is providing valuable information on How to Live Well Everyday and it provides 10 Instant Destressors for today's busy woman.

Note: I may or may not have been using the toilet at the time.

I am reading through the suggestions for instant destressing, such as but not limited to chewing a piece of sugarless gum, loosening restrictive clothing, burning a scented candle, calling a friend to chat, laughing.

But then I find my favorite suggestion of all.

Note: Not really.

Give yourself a time-out. Set the alarm on your phone for 5 minutes, find a quiet place (even if it's a bathroom stall) and just sit and breathe deeply.

Really? Sit in a bathroom stall? And breathe deeply? Where other people are doing their business?

Wow.

Theoretically, however, I could kill a lot of birds with just one stone as I sit in the stall breathing deeply with my clothing unrestricted for obvious reasons while burning a scented to candle to cover the scent of well, you know, and enjoying my sugarless gum and calling a friend on my cellphone to chat because who doesn't think it's classy to talk on the phone in a public restroom of all places and laughing, oh yes. There will be laughing.

Note: Really?

Heck, no!

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