Thursday, March 3, 2011

Blame It On The Signs.



I am passenger-ing on the freeway.

Note: I am not driving. If I were driving, some of the activities in which I am engaging may be deemed dangerous or potentially illegal.

Additional Note: It is also possible, yes, that some of the activities in which I am engaging are potentially illegal regardless of my driving status.

Oh, simmer down. Can't anyone take a joke these days?

I am noticing signs today. There are billboards for Liposuction and We Will Adopt Your Baby. And there are lots of street signs. Road Twenty-Nine, Road Thirty, Road Thirty-One.

Note: I am in the boonies, yes.

There is a sign for a Wildlife and Bird Sanctuary. And there is wildlife! And there are birds!

Look Honey, there's a Snowy Egret, I say and Look! A Mallard Duck, which is the only duck I can ever hope to identify because of its green head and Look at that Flock of Canadian Geese!

Note: And the Geese are goosing each other. But of course, they goose with their sharp beaks, not their cupped hands. I do not believe that I will be trying the Geese form of Goosing anytime soon.

And I am wondering how the egrets and the mallards and the geese learned to read and found the Wildlife Refuge and Sanctuary in the first place. Incredible!

But my favorite sign in on the back of a Semi Truck.

Note: I am wondering why it is called Semi. A small pickup or SUV would be a semi-truck. The Semi Truck I am looking at is most definitely a FULL-FLEDGED Truck.

THE SIGN is written on cardboard with large black lettering and is duct-taped to the back of the trailer. It reads: Ladies! Have some fun. Flash me your Tatas!

I do not have time to appropriately analyze the pros and cons of this opportunity. The Hub is pulling alongside the Semi Truck in our Aging SUV. The Truck Driver smiles down at me. At least, I believe that he is smiling. His long mustache obscures the view, slightly.

That is all.

The End.

Heck, yes!

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