A Trophy Wife Quiz. About Ants, Mostly.

Today, the Trophy Wife tests the knowledge of both of her readers regarding ant life. In the microwave, yes.

The following questions are presented in a True or False format.

True or False: In their desperation, ants will assess the specks of spatter and cooked on gunk in the corner of the microwave as a significant food source and will send out the ant calvary to return with more and more ants who will, in turn, seize the specks of spatter and cooked on gunk in the corner of the microwave and will find more dried bits underneath the rotating microwave tray and near the vent in the top of the appliance.

True. Desperate ants also enjoy used Kleenex, sadly.

True or False: After five minutes in a microwave on 'High Power', ants begin to 'pop' or 'crackle', if you will.

False. But that would be awesome.

True or False: After five minutes in a microwave on 'High Power' with a mug of water, ants retain enough moisture to be killed by the waving micros.

False. But the ants run all around all over the microwave, like the teeny tiny tourists that were attacked by King Kong, which according to my metaphor, is me.

Sweet Holy Moses!

True or False: Scurrying teeny tiny tourist ants succumb to Lysol Anywhere Daily Disinfecting Spray.

True. And False. The ants succumb, yes, but new ones quickly arrive to take their place. Two by two, even. And then they succumb. And then new ants arrive. And then they succumb.

And then they arrive. And then they succumb. And then they arrive. And then they succumb.